Dr. Pharma Seuss – Humorous Pharmacy Poem

Oh the things you can fill
For the folks who are ill.
With your bright shiny spatula
Oh, what a thrill.

Besmocked and bedecked out
In Pharmacist clothes
Knowing all of the things
That a Pharmacist knows.

You’re quick and efficient,
You’re sharp and inventive.
It also just happens
You’re very attentive.

You read slips of paper
To get the specifics
From doctors who scribble out
Strange hieroglyphics.

Could it be Climara?
Or maybe Aldara
It might be a Fludara
Then it might be Femara

Then you pour out the pills
On your pill counting tray
And you count, and you count
And you count pills all day.

You count them by fives
To the rhythm and beat
Of the songs that you learned
On Sesame Street

And the customers gripe
And complain while you’re fillin’
Could it be the whole world
Is on ‘Grouchacillin?’

My pills are too big
And my co-pay’s too high!
Take it four times a day?
I cannot comply!

You fill and you bill
And you feel so dejected
‘Cause half of your claims
Are being rejected.

Then you scoff down your sandwich
In one single bite
Which if done in a restaurant
Would be impolite

But a Doc’s on line one
Mrs. Jones on line two
She has 500 pills
Will you cut them in two?

And the drug reps, they tap
On your counter, tap, tap.
To give you their spiel
It’s a never-ending recap.

There’s pens and there’s post-its
There’s free stuff galore
But the really cool clock’s
For the doc who’s next door

Then ol’ Mrs. Snifflemore
Gives you that smile
And you know once again
That it’s almost worthwhile

So you hang up your smock
And put down your free pen.
Tomorrow you’ll do it
All over again.

Oh the things you will fill
For the folks who are ill.
With your bright shiny spatula
Oh, what a thrill!